How the bhuta chelas (ghosts) abducted Maya Kṛṣṇa Consciousness

 

Every surrendered jiva soul in mrtyuloka Loved Śrīla Prabhupāda and Śrī Kṛṣṇa a lot.

But the bhuta-chelas, from beelzebubbloka,
they certainly
Did NOT!

The bhuta-chelas hated Prabhupāda !
Well, Because,
Śrīla Prabhupāda was a beacon!

Now, please don’t ask why.
No one quite knows the reason.

It could be their heads weren’t screwed on just right.

It could be, perhaps, that their robes were way too tight.

But i think that the most likely reason of all,

May have been that their hearts were twenty two sizes too small.

Whatever the reason, their hearts or their amnesia,

The cellies lived everyday to hate Prabhupāda, Śrī Kṛṣṇa and the surrendered jivas

While staring up from their graves with a sour, evil eye

At the warm glowing hearts above progressing toward The Spiritual Sky.

A bitter envy erupted because of the jivan muktas propaganda,

of happily and continuously singing The Hare Kṛṣṇa Maha-mantra.

“And, uhhhh, really, they’re glorifying this Śrīla Prabhupāda !” they snarled with a sneer,

“Tomorrow MORE will join them, and TOMORROW is PRACTICALLY HERE!”

Then they growled, with bhuta-chela fingers nervously drumming,

” WE MUST find some way to STOP this Hare Kṛṣṇa movement FROM SPREADING !!!”

For everyday hereafter, they knew the surrendered jivas aim,

Was to convince more and more jivas to sing Sri Kṛṣṇa’s Holy Names !

And specifically praise Śrīla Prabhupāda a beautiful soul so divine

As their eternal Spiritual Master, escaping the influence of time…..

But…….. that……….

That ! Oh, that…. ugggghhhhhh….
Oh… THAT… NOISE !

Noise! Noise ! NOISE !!!!!!

NOISE !!! NOISE ! ¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡ NOISE !!!!!!!

See the surrendered jivas also, would sit down to honor Sri Kṛṣṇa Prasadam in groups

And intermingle talk of Śrīla Prabhupāda with Kṛṣṇa-kathā, in many loops.

Noise noise noise was all the ghosts could hear

While the open hearted entities were full of Mantra-Rock cheer

And so they would talk about Kṛṣṇa and feast !
And they’d talk. And they would feast!
And they would FEAST!

FEAST! FEAST! FEAST!
And
KIRTANA ! KIRTANA ! KIRTANA !

Yes, The surrendered jivas would feast on Narayana’s Nine Vegetable Stir fry

And on Panca Tattva Pad thai

They would feast on Primo Pakoras in honor of Prahlada

And Sri Arjuna’s Most Excellent Enchiladas !

They would gulp down saffron milk named after Sadasiva

And enough Tilaks tamarind tea to overfill a whole RIVER !

When Laksmana’s luscious lasagna came out, it was such a special treat

The devotees raved “First Class!”, others proclaimed, “Elite!”

They also would feast on Matsya’s Mango lassi till they couldn’t breathe

And then top it off with some of Isvara’s Immaculate Ice Cream !

Kuruksetra King carob milk was available to warmly caress that frigid delight.

Inducing a near prasadam coma in all souls on site.

And just when the cellies thought the devotees were over and finished

The surrendered jivas busted out the cream, paneer, and added to it some spinach !

And if the Bhimasena army was around wolf belly intact

Then the feast included the following, please do not redact

Lord Visnu’s veggie pizza
Mother Shabari’s cauliflower safari
Lord Siva’s sheet cake
Kalpa Vrksa chesapeake cakes
Janardana’s jackfruit jalopy
Balarama’s Bodacious black bean burgers
Lord Caitanya’s Kirtana cheese fries
Nal and Neel’s Knockout nachos
Ganga’s Golden Bullet
Śrīla Prabhupāda’s Paradise pancakes
Nilamadahva’s non french Supremely Famous Toast

This is what the surrendered jivas did, every single day

Celebrating Śrīla Prabhupāda and Śrī Kṛṣṇa, because they knew
No Other Way

And somehow, that is what the bhuta- chelas liked least of ALL!

See, every surrendered jiva in mrtuyloka, the tall and the small,

Would stand close together, with Kartalas a ringing.

And they’d Glorify Śrīla Prabhupāda by singing and singing

They’d sing! And they’d sing! And they’d SING!
And they’d SING !!

SING! SING! SING!

Nama om Visnu-padaya,

Kṛṣṇa-presthaya bhu-tale

Srimate Bhaktivedanta swamin iti namine

Namas te Sarasvate DEVAM

Gaura-vani-pracarine

nirvishesa shunyavadi

paschatya desha tarine

Jaya Śrī Kṛṣṇa Caitanya

Prabhu Nityananda

Śrī Advaita, Gadadhara

Śrīvasadi

Gaura Bhakta Vrnda

Hare Kṛṣṇa Hare Kṛṣṇa

Kṛṣṇa Kṛṣṇa Hare Hare

Hare Rama Hare Rama

Rama Rama Hare Hare !

And the more the bhuta-chelas thought of
Śrīla Prabhupāda,
The feasting,
And this Maha Mantra Singing,

The more they became consumed with
“WE must stop this whole CUSSING Thing!”

” Yes WE must curb it IMMEDIATELY!” they screamed with a scowl.

” WE HAVE TO, WE MUST STOP this Moovement from expanding ! But HOW?”

Then they got an idea! An awful idea!

THE bhuta-chellies
GOT A WONDERFUL,
TERRIBLY AWFUL
IDEA!

“We know Just what to do….!” The bhuta-chellies snickered from the weeds.

And they quickly shaved there heads and fashioned some beads.

And they chuckled, and clucked, about their forthcoming debut

“With our external makeover , we to
LOOK just like……..
……….. Sadhu.”

“Now, all we need is a chance…” Cackled the bhuta-chellies looking around.

But, since chances are scarce, there was none to be found.

Did that stop the old chellies? No! The chellies simply said,

“If we can’t find a chance, we’ll make one instead!”

Yes they decided to do the most atrocious thing ever

They chose to an attempt to get rid of Śrīla Prabhupāda forever.

See they decided to commit the crime of the universe

Simultaneously hallucinating they had out foxed the ensuing curse

So THEY could be worshiped
and the pure
Hare Kṛṣṇa Mooovement
would
VANISH !

And again Bhumi-loka would be plunged back into confusion and sadness.

So what they did was seance in the depths of hell for a number of years

Before they absurdly proposed they were Śrīla Prabhupāda only heirs.

When did they do this ?
Before Prabhupāda ever “departed”

Because when you’re that cold your heart is forevermore hardened.

Soooooo,

Then the ghosts FORMERLY arrived ready to circulate

Their “flesh and blood” propaganda trying to decrease The “awakened’s” birthing rate.

“Time to enact Program Number One,” the bhuta-chelas hissed,

And they climbed onto their throne of lies, empty promises in fist.

to start boasting of their divinity, holier than thou

That demanded a Must
for their godbrothers and godsisters
to bow down
to
Them
NOW !

Meanwhile the surrendered jivas had all been living sweet transcendental Kṛṣṇa dreams

Lost in the bliss of a little blue boys schemes

the ghosts however were busy usurping Śrīla Prabhupāda’s position.

Trying to bastardize the patient’s Eternal Goloka Vrndavana Physician

Who is curing all the favorable jivas lining up in that row,

But, the miserable lusts for company, this we all know.

So the ghosts went after “THEM” with deeds so heinous

That they cannot be spoken of on these pages, just on that basis

They also changed the Holy books that the surrendered jiva’s would sing and dance from

In the attempt to create a world of the deaf and GHOSTLY dumb

They also told the jivas the feasts were offered totally wrong

And that they should never ever ever sing again that Śrīla Prabhupāda song

They also changed the names of The Lord that were sung out loud

to some guys named krsno and ramo, which probably made those two really proud

They even went to the extremes of closing the temples and farms galore

To the point they thought that the Prabhupāda disciples were a thing of yore

The Bhuta celebs
yes the ghostly celebrities tried to destroy everything Śrīla Prabhupāda and His crew constructed

By selling their souls to a chump, seduced by promises criminal and corrupted

But alas, after banning, and beating and killing devotees,

Raping, and molesting and making themselves trustees

The ghosts did properly execute every diabolical policy they could think

To destroy the Krsna Conscious Moovement and leave it on extinctions brink

BUT

Lo and behold, there was a voice from the ether

It resounded low and clear, but who exactly was the speaker ?

The bhuta cellies looked at each other confused with disbelief

Because they thought pure and favorable Kṛṣṇa Consciousness was thwarted by their deceit

Nonetheless the statement they heard clearly was exactly just this

“Hypocrites will never succeed as long as I exist!”

The speaker we do know, was the creator of this creation

Bhagavan Śrī Kṛṣṇa, the thorn in the side of their operation

Thereafter the ghosts puzzled for a time until their puzzlers were sore

Thinking, “How could this be so ? We hadn’t thought of this before.

Hypocrites won’t succeed as long as I exist ?

Well this certainly wasn’t a box we checked off on our list !”

see what the cellies couldn’t plan for was Śrī Kṛṣṇa’s Supreme Will.

Something they could never erase
nor alter
nor KILL

this ultimate reality was now certainly being viewed

for the ghosts only abducted themselves, and the fools who want to be fooled

see the joke was on them, they never abducted the real Bhakti school

for that is something that is unconquerable, it IS the Crown Jewel

the prime living substance, something that can never be destroyed

because Bhakti yoga is the delicious treat the surrendered jivas live to enjoy.

while what the cellies stole and present is something purely pathetic

a hoax, a fraud, a hologram, the opposite of angelic

Put a tent on that circus, its a clown show for sure

Nothin but dumb asses and gorus, kicking down deaths door.

An illusion of grandeur, a 10th class joke

Because if you don’t really know Prabhupāda
you only know what you know

Yes, mercifully, some jiva souls were made completely immune

To the perverted reflections of reality known as bhuta- chela cartoons

Well how did some of the jivas escape this charade ? you may ask

It was and still is pretty easy, not at all a difficult task

SEE the jiva souls loved Prabhupāda and kept everything intact

Keeping far far away from the ghostly changes and their Mayavadi attack

Instead, they tenderly and naturally kept perfect Hare Kṛṣṇa Consciousness secure

AND kept far far away from those who would worship the impure

Because that would immediately destroy their loving connection

With Śrīla Prabhupāda and Śrī Kṛṣṇa, leaving them unprotected

Yes this is where the story actually begins and also where it ends

The end of the posers but the beginning of well wishing friends

The friends of all continue to share the absolute real thing

While the posers have met their own demise by swinging on the lies they sing

All glory to Śrīla Prabhupāda, a soul who is never afraid.

All glory to all the surrendered jiva souls making it out unscathed

All glory to The Sankirtana-yagna raging in the ghosts religiosity

NONE of that can,
nor will, ever,
Ever be abducted,
stamp that with INFINITY !

 

Vibhisana Vidura Vani

Relayed to reality from an old impersonal tale of shenanigans.