IN REFLECTION
A Recovering Monk – Digesting My Extended Adolescence
July 2nd, 2015:
Dear Friends,
For several months now I have made a conscious decision to keep my distance from the Gaudiya Vaishnava community, Sri Caitanya Sangha, and almost all the people therein. During that time, some have reached out to me, but I have almost without exception ignored communication or postponed it indefinitely. I’ve done this because I’ve needed the space to process my own thoughts and experiences, and to determine how I wish to move forward. All along it’s been clear that this letter would be written, but not when and how.
In recent days, for reasons that aren’t entirely known to me, rumors have begun to flourish. This has come to my attention most notably in the form of emails from Tripurari Swami and two of his closest students, as well as by snippets of word of mouth. It’s said that “life is what happens when you’re making other plans,” and through these rumors life has forced me to adjust my own plans. So here I am, seeking to convey my perspective thoroughly and clearly. I ask that you take the time to read and consider all that I have said.
Below I am going to, in painstaking detail and complete candor, relay where my life stands now and what has brought me to this point. I’m going to do this by publicly responding to the last two emails I have received from Tripurari Swami, neither of which I have previously responded to. I’ve come to believe firmly that transparency is foundational in healthy relationships of any kind. Moreover, it may be the only thing with the potential to illuminate deceptive and manipulative relationships, organizations, and ideologies. » More here «
http://www.iskcon-truth.com/childabuse/childabu.htm
http://www.henrydoktorski.com/nv/Faith_Is_Blind.html
https://www.salon.com/2001/07/02/krishna/
Stop-sexual-child-abuse-iskcon-krsna-schools
This post is certainly filled with courage and resourcefulness. The depression for many of us is that there are no active Srila Prabhupada leaders who are physically standing up to do what they have sworn to do. They are completely silent and inactive without even an ounce of courage.. They cannot even write two sentences together for one thought. They ignore your concerns because they are as we used to say ” having too much fun”
At least you have some connection for your team. However, those in the whole world who Srila Prabhupada entrusted into our care now have NOTHING! There are no leaders anymore. I do not know what it will take to bring forth the original Hare Krsna movement. Is that possible at all? Those who claim to be knowledgeable pundit brahmanical leaders in the Prabhupadanugas clan have not shown any movement yet. I have tried and tried for many years to find just one devotee who is willing to teach the original Gita on line even from their own plan. Not one response. Silence. So, what kind of hellish position is that?
We are all on our own. The best way to proceed is to simply trust Srila Prabhupada teachings from your heart and ignore any so-called Hare Krsna organizations at all for the foreseeable future. So far as I have experienced this site is the only one that has been fair to those who want to post anything. Strict but fair. They even answer your e mails with actual sentences and logic. I have not found any site that allows opinions. They have that comment function on their sites but those functions do not work. Srila Prabhupada said many times that everyone is allowed their opinions. Thank you for sharing your experiences and your web site. Excellent spiritual therapy for many of us. Misery does love company afterall. The Spiritual Master And The Disciple link below as well as the Gita Guide link below.
The Spiritual Master and The Disciple
https://archive.org/details/in.ernet.dli.2015.65753/page/n3/mode/2up
Page 170
The Spiritual Master and the Disciple
The spiritual master orders and empowers his disciples to preach (and to write)
The spiritual master likes to see his disciples preach the sankirtana movement for others’ benefit; the spiritual master authorizes the sincere devotee to do so:
TRANSLATION
“ ‘My dear child, continue dancing, chanting and per- forming sankirtana in association with devotees Furthermore, go out and preach the value of chanting krsna-nama, for by this process You will be able to deliver all fallen souls ’ ”
PURPORT It is another ambition of the spiritual master to see his disciples not only chant, dance and follow the regulative principles but also preach the sankirtana movement to others in order to deliver them, for the Krsna consciousness movement is based on the principle that one should become as perfect as possible in devotional service oneself and also preach the cult for others’ benefit
Srila Bhaktisiddhanta SarasvatT Thakura explains in his Anubhdsya, “A person who has attracted the attention of the spiritual master by his sincere service likes to dance and chant with similarly developed Krsna conscious devotees The spiritual master authorizes devotee to deliver fallen souls in all parts of the world ”Cc Adi 7 92 {Adi 2, pp. 73-74)
The Spiritual Master and The Disciple
https://archive.org/details/in.ernet.dli.2015.65753/page/n3/mode/2up
https://www.prabhupadanugas.eu/news/?p=50257
Pamho agtacbsp, i feel sorry to hear about this bad dream all of us is having a bad dream to different levels in this dukhalayam asasvatam temporary and full of suffering it will come to the end in the same way he came in our lives by taking freedom everything but the suicide is not the solution it’s in ignorance therefore can cause just more trouble the solution is Sri Krishna I mean more suicide one feel and more one must depend on Krishna srila prabhupada also say that in few words we can make more advancement in Krishna consciousness through krsna smarana we must learn how to do everything compare to the transcendental body of Sri Krishna that’s the secret to become a Pukka Brahma nistham because everything reside in vasudeva sarvam ITI SA mahatma sudurlabha agtacbsp ys haribol
Charles Dawson says ;
” Those who claim to be knowledgeable pundit brahmanical leaders in the Prabhupadanugas clan have not shown any movement yet. I have tried and tried for many years to find just one devotee who is willing to teach the original Gita on line even from their own plan. Not one response. Silence. So, what kind of hellish position is that? ”
May I add to it that that one devotee seems obvious is YOU, Prabhu.
Why do you have to say this ; ” So, what kind of hellish position is that? ”
it is not a hellish position at all or is it ?
Hare Krishna. All Glories to Srila Prabhupada.
′′ Let go the people who are not prepared to love you. This is the hardest thing you will have to do in your life and it will also be the most important thing. Stop having hard conversations with people who don’t want to change.
Stop showing up for people who are not interested in your presence. I know your gut is to do everything to earn the appreciation of those around you, but it’s a boost that steals your time, energy, mental and physical health.
When you begin to fight for a life with joy, interest and commitment, not everyone will be ready to follow you in this place. This doesn’t mean you need to change what you are, it means you should let go the people who aren’t ready to accompany you.
If you are excluded, insulted, forgotten or ignored by the people you give your time to, you don’t do a favor by continuing to offer your energy and your life. The truth is you are not for everyone and not everyone is for you.
That’s what makes it so special when you find people you have friendship or love with. You will know how precious it is because you experienced what is not.
The more time you spend trying to make you love for someone you can’t, the more time you spend depriving yourself of the possibility of this connection with someone else.
There are billions of people on this planet and many of them will meet you, at your level of interest and commitment.
The more you stay involved with people who use you as a pillow, a background option or a therapist for emotional healing, the longer you walk away from the community you want.
Maybe if you stop showing up, you won’t be wanted. Maybe if you stop trying, the relationship will end. Maybe if you stop texting your phone will stay dark for weeks
That doesn’t mean you ruined the relationship; it means the only thing holding back was the energy only you gave to keep it.
This is not love, it’s attachment. It’s wanting to give a chance to those who don’t deserve it You deserve a lot, there are people who shouldn’t be in your life, you’ll realize.
The most valuable thing you have in your life is your time and energy as both are limited. When you give your time and energy, you define your existence.
When you realize this, you begin to understand why you are so anxious when you spend time with people, in activities, places or situations that don’t suit you and shouldn’t be around you, you get stolen in energy.
You will begin to realize that the most important thing you can do for yourself and everyone around you is to protect your energy more viciously than anything else.
Make your life a safe haven, in which only ′′ compatible ′′ people are allowed with you.
You are not responsible for saving anyone You are not responsible for convincing them to improve. It’s not your work to exist for people and give your life to them!
Because if you feel bad, if you feel obligated, you will be the root of all your problems by your insistence, fearing that you will not be returned the favours you have given. It is your only obligation to realize that you are the master of your destiny and accept the love you think you deserve.
Decide that you deserve true friendship, commitment.” true and complete love with healthy and prosperous people. Then wait and see how much everything starts to change and it will change, that’s for sure, with positive people and good energy, don’t waste time with people who aren’t worth it, change will give you the love, the esteem, happiness and the protection you deserve.
I will not bother anymore. I have my family and close associates to work with. Lord Caitanya will have to personally take complete control of what is left of Srila Prabhupada’s movement. America is on the verge of a vicious bloody civil war. Prepare in all ways possible. I will check from time to time to see if anyone is posting teaching classes.
So long everyone.
https://www.prabhupadanugas.eu/news/?p=50257
I had forgotten to give credit of the above post that ended with ….”the protection you deserve.” to the actor Anthony Hopkins