I feel the desire to write something for Srila Prabhupada on his anniversary of his disappearance day. Wow it was 44 years ago, and I was only 14 years old. Devotees had been giving us news that Prabhupada was very sick and bedridden for months. Every day I would pray with the devotees for his health and recovery. I would see him being carried in his rocking chair wearing big sunglasses to take Darshan of Gaura Nitai, Krsna Balaram and Radha Shayam Sundar.
Then that afternoon on November 14th during lunch time I heard the news that Prabhupada may leave his body within hours. I left my lunch half eaten and ran to his quarters. Many devotees surrounded his bed singing kirtan with much grief and sadness. I didn’t believe he would leave us in his physical form. Of course, he would tell us all the time that he may pass away anytime, and that we all needed to take guidance from his books and instructions. I thought he would tell me what my service would be when I grew up.
I stayed in the kirtan until I had to leave to offer aratik in the temple. After aratik I got distracted while eating maha prasadam and talking instead of going back to his room. Then the news came out that he had just passed away. I knew all was going to change in ISKCON. I felt I had lost our eternal guide and master. I felt a real darkness and emptiness. Despite of all the changes and severe hardships I suffered in ISKCON and outside I try to remain his disciple by following his instructions with the best of my abilities. I beg to remain at his lotus feet eternally.
(by Dwarkadisha dasa)
Pamho agtacbsp, almighty Sri krsna please let your holy pure devotees to be glorified, especially in this special day of the disappearance day of hdg acbsp tirobhava mahotsava , is not worthy to glorify a miserable in the guise of guru , let all the foolish to be distroyed by their same cheating, we want only the pure devotees to deliver the world from this cheating and not ex meleccha , yavana , pulinda , candala etc. ..which are increasing this nasty cheating, Srila prabhupada thank you to not make me to be used by the nasty usurpers of your transcendental position , I wish to become a pure devotee by associating with your good instructions life after life, I’m very grateful to you for showing me my hidden bhakti for Sri Syama -sundaram by reminding me about the goal of life , hope to meet you when I leave this rotten and troublesome body machine born from the refusals to serve Sri Sri guru&gauranga , jaya srila prabhupada tirobhava mahotsava ki jaya , ys haribol